The Sweetwaters in England: 15 November 2009

Ice skating cancelled because it was too slippy

Health and safety didn't allow us to ice skate at Dogmersfield's school fete as the teeming rain made the rink too slippy. It's almost worth contacting the Daily Mail to inform them of this fantastic illustration of "world gone crazy". But don't worry, I managed to restrain myself.

We were all geared up to losing fingers, thick woolly socks and general carnage but to no avail. A sad day for the Sweetwaters.

Classic Oliver Quotes

Oliver is obviously thinking about stuff lately. A lot of stuff that makes Mama and Dada slightly nervous.

Oliver (on seeing two ramblers): Mama, I think, I think those people walking are why the earth goes round.

Later that day....

Oliver: Dada, what are girls like?

Dada: In what way?

Oliver: What do girls… what do they do?

Dada: They mostly do whatever boys do although sometimes they like different things to boys. Is that what you mean?

Oliver: What are girls for? Do girls go into boys?

Dada (desperately hoping this wasn't about to turn "in-depth"): Do you mean "do girls turn into boys"?

Oliver: Yes.

Dada: No. Boys are always boys and girls are always girls. Is Nonna a girl?

Oliver: Yes

Dada: So, she hasn't changed into a boy, has she?

Oliver: No. So why are there girls and boys?

Dada: Well, it's a bit complicated… [dada awaits inevitable further question that will require the "birds and bees" conversation being had a few years earlier than expected]

Oliver: Oh, okay.

[Oliver turns and walks off. Dada feels a bullet has been dodged, for now]